Advice+colum

Got a problem and scared to share it? Submit it anonymously to either Papa O (for the guys) or Mama O (for the ladies).

Or if you would like you can get the opposite genders advice.


 * Got a question for either mama O or Papa O.

Why is everything so different every time you enter a new grade? friends always seem to change,styles as well. just seems odd to me. maybe you could offer a little light on the situation.

-Mama O here. Honestly, i will never know why people always change. It's a part of life. People start to discover who they are, they start to discover who they wish they could be. And it really is weird. Why can't everyone just stay the same.? A person develops new tastes and interest, and to them the most obvious thing they can do is change. I'm not sure if this helps but there's a little insight on why people might change.


 * Dear Mama O,

I have this friend, or I used to have this friend, that I'm currently fighting with. I have been friends with her since Pre-K and never had this much of a problem with her, but now I find the things she does more and more irritating. Shes an only child and honestly is pretty spoiled, but until now I've been able to overlook that. This is what happened, she was talking to me again about a show that she knows I don't like and I expressed my distaste for it again in hopes she would change the subject. The next thing I know she's screaming at me loud enough for the entire cafeteria to hear about how all I do is complain and be negative and if I can't get over myself I can find somewheres else to sit. I replied that maybe if she considered what I would like to talk about I would have more positve thing to say, then she told me she could do whatever she wanted and continued like that until the bell rang. I was very angry afterwards and decided to stop talking to her. Three weeks went by without me saying a word to her but she never seemed to notice. This has only made things worse, and yet it seems a waste that one fight would ruin such a long friendship. What should I do?

Anonymous

-Great question.! I am currently going through something like this with one of my long-time friends, and I totally understand how you feel. First off, does she have bipolar disorder or something.? I've dealt with a friend like that for quite a while BEFORE she got her meds. Once she got them, her little explosions stopped. I realize this sounds rude, but if you're close to her, maybe you could pull her aside and just ask if she's alright. Speaking of asking if she's alright, she may be having problems in her life. Like I said, if you guys are close, you should ask her if there's something wrong that she needs to talk about (I've noticed when you don't talk about how you feel, or write down what you're going through, you tend to explode at people). I respect your decision to not talk to her. It gives you time to cool down and figure out a mature way to deal with it. I also realize that the fact she isn't noticing would be very aggravating. Unfortunately, you do have to work it out at some point. Tell her something along the lines of what you just wrote to me. Tell her that you don't like how she randomly freaks out at you for no reason and how you've been wondering if it's worth it to be friends anymore. Her reaction to you telling her will be the answer if you guys should remain friends or not. Hope this helps.!!